Treasure the Taco Bell, among other things

I am not a big fan of change. I don’t really like that life is full of sad endings and new beginnings and that it is moving forward at such a scary pace. I don’t want things to change. But unfortunately, they do. My sister is heading to college. She’s going to experience her first freshman football game, her first frat party and her first all nighter as she’s studying for her challenging courses. I’m happy for her, I swear. I just wish our year in high school together could have lasted a little longer.

All my life, my mom has never let me say, “I can’t wait ‘till….”. She’s always told me I was supposed to enjoy every second, even the boring ones, because apparently one day, I was going to wish for those seconds back.

I’ve always tried to follow her advice, but I followed it blindly, because I didn’t really understand. After this school year, I finally get it. I’m wishing for all the seconds back – the exciting, the awful, and just like she said, even the boring.

For the first time in my life, I’m not counting down to summer. I’m not looking forward to bonfires on the beach, or relaxing by the pool, and I’m definitely not looking forward to graduation. My best friend, my roommate, my mentor, and my carpool, is graduating, and although this is going to be one of the biggest changes in my life and I’m terrified, I’m thankful that she taught me how quickly time passes.

Now I am painfully aware of how precious each of those moments we have shared this year have been. Our early morning stops at Starbucks, the times we screamed our favorite songs in the car, or ran to Taco Bell before practice, are times that are never going to happen again.

Of course we’ll make new memories as we get older but the ones we made in high school are coming to an end. I didn’t realize our last Taco Bell run was our last, but now that I do, I wish I would have slowed down and taken just a second to appreciate every sip of my large Diet Coke with extra ice.

I’m never going to wish away a second again. I’m not going to countdown the days or say “I just have to survive this week.” Instead I’m going to enjoy the little things and I’m going to at least try to love every second.

Every year things happen that will never happen again, like first days of high school and awkward first kisses. We let so many important moments, moments that shape who we are pass us by because we’re so busy looking toward the future and what we’re going to do next. Each year offers something special that we need to slow down and savor. My freshman year came and went, and it feels like it lasted maybe three and a half minutes.

I’m not going to say, “I can’t wait till I’m a sophomore.” I’m going to enjoy every minute until my sister graduates and try to live each day for the experiences it has to offer rather than wishing my life away.   

I’ve learned to try to love every second even if I wish I had used them differently, or wish I had them back, or wish I loved them even more.

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