Even the best male feminist still sucks
We have a nice pal who prides himself on being a feminist. He respects women. He listens when we speak. He doesn’t interrupt us. He stops mansplaining when we call him out on it. However, that all changes when we disagree. Then, we become catty, bossy rude, aggressive and mean.
Even the best male feminist is first a male, then a feminist. A fair-weather supporter of the cause, if you will. The effort to upend gender inequity and personal bias comes to a halt at any inkling of a storm.
In order to have a debate, you need to respect your opponent, which becomes difficult when a woman’s impassioned argumentation is aggressive, confidence is arrogance and emphasis is shouting.
Men try to withdraw and elevate themselves by labelling any fight pertaining to women as “girl drama.” By cheapening a woman’s argument to a “cat fight” or “girl drama,” it becomes impossible to be received with any validity (because, of course, girl drama is hormone fueled and jealousy driven!). Arguing against someone that thinks nonsense of every word that comes out of your mouth is belittling.
Women have a double battle to fight: 1) the actual debate and 2) they have something valid to say in the first place. They carry the constant burden to prove that their opinion has worth. Take, for example, the 2020 Presidential Race. We constantly hear how women have no way to win because of the “likeability issue” or how people don’t find women “electable.” How many times do we have to hear how Elizabeth Warren is a crazy lady because she wants to tax the ultra-rich to pay for college. All while Joe Biden regurgitates some tired, substanceless line about bringing people together and automatically becomes the beacon for hope in America.
Beto O’Rourke loses a Senate election, leaves his family for weeks to road trip around the country to “find himself” in the wake of this devastating loss and then announces his presidential candidacy on Vanity Fair, declaring that he was born for the role. And still, people view him as a solid, legitimate candidate. If a woman candidate were to act that way, she’d become the biggest laugh of America. The message is abundantly clear: empty, ridiculous words from men hold far more value than substantive arguments from women. But male “feminists” don’t bat an eye. The notion that a woman can run for president is accepted, but actually winning? Ha!
The idea behind this particular brand of feminism is far more about men validating themselves as decent, good quality dudes, not the actual support behind the movement to equality. At the end of the day, it is far easier for a man to make women feel small in order to make himself big. Where a woman can be exploited is where a man reaps his strength.
Feminism is not just a buzz word to pin to your vintage Dickies. It also means absolutely nothing when you only apply it at your convenience. To be an actual feminist, you have to constantly monitor your behavior and ask yourself, are my actions the product of ingrained stereotypical modes of thought? Am I being a ninny?
But that obviously takes a lot of effort and it is much easier to don those pair of Dickies and call it a day.
