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There are few things more terrifying for the modern teenager than the text message warning that “you have used 75% of your monthly data” or “you are being charged for an extra gigabyte.” However, this is a regular occurrence for those of us without the blessing of unlimited data, and it is sure to…
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This column comes to you from what is sure to be my death bed. For the last week, I have been infected with what I have decided to describe as the modern plague. And although unlike the plague, this cold is unlikely to literally kill you, it will be sure to kill your academic…
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It’s that time of the year again, when everything is terrifying and teenagers are up late at night, sometimes even until the early morning hours. That’s right, it’s midterms! Oh, yeah, also Halloween. Back in August, we all started seeing the black and orange decorations lining the aisles of stores and the pumpkin-flavored-everything filling…
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There are fifty-two cards in a deck, or, if you include jokers, fifty-four. I learned this lesson the hard way, through a game of “52 Card Pickup” initiated by my demonic older brother. While this was a rather unpleasant way to embed this lesson in my head, I haven’t forgotten it since, so you…
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Clichés, we learned in our first semester of freshman English class, are to be avoided. Like a literary equivalent to stale saltine crackers, not even the hungriest kids for a joke want to hear them. Although well intentioned, like that one weird family friend who lingered far too long after that family reunion, the…
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According to Uncle Ben from “Spider-Man”, “with great power comes great responsibility.” I first learned what it truly meant to have superpowers in the sixth grade when I was given my first super cool slide-out texting phone (I never counted my TracFone as a real phone). To be fair, my first reaction to this…