The time I was sent to Saturday School and survived

9 a.m. on a Thursday morning: I was in the middle of Government class tending to my Snapchat streaks. All of a sudden, a student office aid burst through the door, thrusting a pale slip towards my teacher. My teacher then passed the flimsy slip to me, “This is a reminder that you are to serve Saturday school this Saturday, October 14th,” the slip said. Immediately, I saw the potential for a great article, despite my unjust sentencing.

To be sent to Saturday school, a student must have three absences from one specific period. At the time in my student Q connect attendance details, I was marked truant for only two periods, failing to meet the offense criteria. I also believe the administration mishandled my case by neglecting my request for a supervisor in our email conversation, jeopardizing my rights and safety as a student.

Newbury Park High School, 8 a.m., Saturday morning. There were only about ten people within the room, all of whose faces looked as if television static was playing behind their eyes. Upon entering I was forced to surrender my phone. After sitting in the silent classroom for about five minutes, I had gotten bored of looking at my fingernails trying to determine which one was the longest; I decided to make friends at Saturday school. I expected it to be like the classic 80s movie, “The Breakfast Club.”

As per regular Saturday School doctrine, the class was split into groups and ordered to do Sisyphus-like labor around campus. With us was a student who spoke minimal English, and I asked him why he was at Saturday school in Spanish. He turned towards me smiling while shaking his head, and told me in a thick accent, “Bad things.” We immediately became friends.

My group, the first group, was ordered to pick up trash around campus covering up all the garbage. I live by the mentality of doing as little unnecessary work as possible, so I decided to just chat with the campus supervisor instead. Our “conversation” mostly surrounded me listening to them complaining about Vice President, Kamala Harris, yet again, I’ll tolerate a lot to get out of doing boring work.

Saturday school is all about reflecting on the school rules that you, the student, violated. In my case, I violated the school’s attendance policy, and the resulting lesson that I was taught was about the dangers of vaping, especially Juul, which was banned by the Food and Drug Administration on June 23rd, 2022.

The teacher handed out a reflection sheet that we were obligated to fill out if we ever wanted to see a free Saturday in our lives. Eventually while filling out the laughable letter as if I hurt someone by not being at school, I came across the question, who would you apologize to? So every reader can be clear, I don’t apologize to anybody.

Newbury Park High School, 12 p.m., Saturday: I was finally free! My dignity had returned after those boring hours of temporary incarceration. Many people might wonder what Saturday school is actually like. Well, I did Saturday school so you, the reader, didn’t have to, and I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty, it is not like the Breakfast Club.