The life lessons of “Boyhood”
“Boyhood” earned six Oscar nominations for the 87th Academy Awards on Feb. 22, including Best Picture, Best Director, and Best Supporting Actor and Actress. A product of over twelve years of patient filming by Richard Linklater, this successful movie is an original, thought-provoking work in which the actors actually “grow up” with their characters.
“Boyhood” follows Mason (Ellar Coltrane) as he grows from an innocent six-year-old to a college bound 18-year-old, with his sister Sam (Lorelei Linklater) and divorced parents Olivia and Mason Sr. (Patricia Arquette, Ethan Hawke) at his side. Audiences watch Mason struggle through a rough childhood surrounded by drunk stepdads, broken hearts, and constant change.
“Boyhood” struck a personal chord with me; I felt as if my life was playing on screen, with a different set of people and a different context, but with the same experiences, emotions and struggles. Here are three things I took away from this story.
- People are resilient, and happiness can be found in the littlest things.
Mason’s childhood was tumultuous and unconventional, marked by constant moving and abusive family members. Yet, he came out alright. Most of the time, he could only nonchalantly observe the chaos around him, unable to do anything because of his age. What sustained him through all this were the little bits of happiness he found scattered throughout life. Whether it was flipping through Victoria’s Secret catalogs with his friends, hiking and camping with dad, goofing around with his step siblings, or having his first kiss, he found small rays of light and stability amid the rest of the discord. I’ll remember Mason’s resilience when I’m stuck somewhere dark, and thanks to him I know there’s always light at the end of the tunnel.
- Nobody goes through life unscathed, but there are different ways to deal with challenges. Some lead to more pain, while others overcome the obstacles.
Burdened with depression and posttraumatic stress disorder, Mason’s two stepdads (Marco Perella, Brad Hawkins) relied on alcohol as an emotional escape. But alcohol only temporarily numbs the pain; afterwards, the hurt is magnified by the empty feelings. There are other ways to deal with life’s issues. For example, Mason’s biological father can only see Mason and his sister on the weekends, but rather than blaming other people and neglecting his fatherly responsibilities altogether, he put in his best effort to spend quality time with his kids. Similarly, Mason’s mother was faced with bleak life prospects, but she decided to pursue advanced college degrees and thus a better life. The choice to tackle problems head on or merely push them to the side will determine the final results – choose wisely.
- Truth hurts, but you gotta face it.
Lost and confused, in high school Mason found peace in photography and its aesthetic expressiveness. Yet, his photography teacher Mr. Turlington (Tom McTigue) harshly warned him, “you’ve got a lot of natural talent. But that fifty cents will just get you a cup of coffee in this whole world.” The reality of our society is that the ones who work hard sometimes rise higher than the ones who are actually talented. His words were blunt, stinging, but true to the core. Realistic advice is the hardest to face: it hurts because of how honest and bare it is, undressed by disguises of pity or kindness. Unless we can face these truths and take the pain, we can never truly learn what’s wrong with us and change for the better.
In the final scene of “Boyhood,” Mason goes hiking with his new college friends. As he marvels at the beauty of the canyons, he reflects that “we are always in the moment.” Just like Mason, I will strive to live life in the moment, even when it’s filled to the brim with stress and uncertainty.
